Our trip to Borneo was meant to be a disaster. Chinese New Year had begun: vacationers were out in full force, flights were double the price and hostels were all booked. The Batang Rejang was dammed and the winter rain had flooded Niah Caves. Â It was beginning to feel like travel hell.
It felt like a good time to throw in the towel, spend a little dough and do something fantastic. So we jumped on a plane to Gunung Mulu, the ultimate in national parks; home to the world’s largest cave, millions of bats and all manner of crazy-huge bugs.
Our first night in Mulu went something like this: Gorgeous sunset, dusk, insects!
The bats keep Mulu fairly mosquito-free, and the bugs that the bat’s don’t eat are nabbed by the geckos. Except, of course, if the bug in question is the size of a bat.
No one believed me when I said that I had found a bug as large, if not even bigger, than the average American bat. “Pics of didn’t happen” was the lame response to my discovery. Well, Roman! Â Here are your pics!
Unfortunately these pictures were taken after the cicada flew into my shirt and tried to make sweet, sweet love to my back.
I was hiding behind a column waiting for the giant bug to fly out of the room when it happened. I didn’t know what to do but run. The mammoth flying cockroach descended so quickly there was nothing you could do but cover your head and bust a move. Â For some reason, I was the only intelligent person in the room who thought to do this, everyone else just sat there eating their meal, staring at me.
And I took off, flailing across the dining hall, screaming at the top of my lungs, and the giant cicada landed on my back. I froze. Time stopped.
After several hours of standing there frozen, a child, a mere baby the age of 10, grabbed the monster from my shirt andÂ put it on his face. And laughed at me.