The trip to Bako National Park is almost more fun than the park itself. Â You must hail down a red bus, hire a longboat driver and manage to avoid the river alligators.
You certainly don’t want to fall in the water on your trip to Bako National Park – but they don’t make it very easy to stay in the boat. Â We nearly flew into the murky brown water each time out canoe-comme-motorboat took on 3-meter high ocean swells from the South China Sea.
Where was Crocodile Dundee when I needed him? Instead we had Mohammad the nihilist boatman who cackled with glee each time we hit a monsoon-season wave.
But crocodiles and capsizing were just the beginning of our Bako park adventure. Â As soon as we got off the boat we were greeted by more naughty monkeys, bearded pigs, super-sized insects and one very poisonous green viper. At this point I realized that perhaps I’m really not a jungle person after all.
Bako has more than a dozen hikes that take you through several different tropical environments. Â It’s pretty cool until you have to pee.
I spent a large part of our hike weighing the benefits of relieving my bladder vs. the likelihood that some strange fish would swim upstream and lodge itself in my urethra. Â But if a parasite didn’t get me, what could I wipe with? Â I didn’t want a nasty jungle rash on my ass. The drama.